Hotel Charges

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Southpaw, May 30, 2010.

  1. Southpaw

    Southpaw Well-Known Member

    May 17, 2007
    Next time you think your hotel bill is too high, you might want to consider this:

    My wife and I are traveling by car from Victoria to Prince George. After almost eleven hours on the road, we were too tired to continue, and decide to take a room. But, we only planned to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road. When we checked out four hours later, the desk clerk hands us a bill for $350.00.

    I explode and demand to know why the charge is so high. I tell the clerk although it's a nice hotel; the rooms certainly aren't worth $350.00 Then the clerk tells me that $350.00 is the 'standard rate'. I insisted on speaking to the Manager.

    The Manager appears, listens to me, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for us to use. 'But we didn't use them.' 'Well, they are here, and you could have,' explains the Manager.

    He goes on to explain we could also have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. 'We have the best entertainers from New York , Hollywood , and Las Vegas perform here,' the Manager says.

    'But we didn't go to any of those shows.'
    'Well, we have them, and you could have,' the Manager replies.

    No matter what amenity the Manager mentions, I reply, 'But we didn't use it!'

    The Manager is unmoved, and eventually I gave up and agreed to pay.

    I write a check and give it to the Manager.

    The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check. 'But sir, this check is only made out for $50.00.'
    'That's correct, as I charged you $300.00 for sleeping with my wife.'

    'But I didn't!' exclaims the Manager.

    'Well, too bad, she was here, and you could have.'
  2. Chas1

    Chas1 Well-Known Member

    Feb 15, 2009
    Good one. :D
  3. catch-34

    catch-34 Well-Known Member

    Feb 4, 2008
  4. sniperjwt

    sniperjwt Well-Known Member

    Dec 27, 2009
    wow thats a good one.
  5. Hairtrigger

    Hairtrigger Well-Known Member

    Jan 10, 2009
    How do you check into a hotel without knowing the room rate?
  6. MN Hunter

    MN Hunter Well-Known Member

    Feb 4, 2009
    That's funny.
    It did remind me of a business trip I took to Chicago about 10 years ago. The owner of the company I worked for was a good man but cheap as the day is long. His favorite line when going out to dinner was - I'm financially embarassed can you cover it. Just a little background - back to the Chicago trip - Needless to say the hotel we checked into was not a four star hotel - maybe 1/4 star. Any how we check in. I get off the elevator and go to my room. The smell of cigar smoke when I opened the door should have sent up the "there's trouble here flag". I enter the room to find towels on the floor. The bed is messed up and there is a cigar smoldering in a coffee cup. I should have just walked out. I pick up the phone and call the front desk. The young female receptionist answers. I explain to her the condition of the room. She calmly responds " I'm sorry sir we must have had a DAY RATE in there - I will sent house keeping up right away to take care of it for you" It was like WTF - a day rate. I got my bags - left my key on the fron desk and walked out.

    Some day if the opportunity presents itself I will tell you about the trade show we went to in Germany - the house he rented - an the tour of the red light district he just had to see at 3am. Not as bad as it sounds - but funnier than heck.
  7. Chas1

    Chas1 Well-Known Member

    Feb 15, 2009
    Don't tease us MN Hunter with if the opportunity arises:) Heck I'd like to hear about this Germany trip and others probably want to hear too!!!
  8. Oliveralan

    Oliveralan Well-Known Member

    Sep 15, 2009
    Haha good one!!
  9. winmag

    winmag Well-Known Member

    Dec 23, 2009
    Smooth. I liked it:D:D