Have you Heard a Funny Hunting Story

[Small Lady]

If you have heard a funny hunting story, or maybe it happened to you, please share it here.

This morning I was talking with a nice woman, who shared a story with me about her husband, and his brothers.
Not sure how many years ago this took place, but seems the four brothers loved hunting moose together every autumn. Yet the wife of one always complained bitterly about the cost of gas, tags, ammo, his ATV, and such, so he always had to be trying to convince her of saving money on groceries, so he could keep going.

This particular year they shot a moose way back from where they had parked their ATVS, so walked out to where they were parked, and tried riding them in. Somehow they managed to get all four stuck, apparently really stuck.
So they contacted a helicopter company to send a helicopter their way. After flying all four ATVS to dry ground, they figured that since it was already on location, to have the moose also flown out. Concerned that the brother with a cheap wife may never be allowed to hunt again, the other three paid for the helicopter. Slowly over time the fourth brother would slip them a little cash here and there, in hopes of someday paying off his indebtedness.
They were always very careful to not let the story slip out at family functions, lest the cheap wife find out.
It seems some years went by, and the daughter of the cheap wife began dating a young man, whose father was a helicopter pilot. As this young love blossomed, the parents of both decided to have a get together. The pilot remembered the fourth brother, because he had found their predicament one of the funniest of his career. Well he brings the story up, and proceeded to tell it. Brother four figures that he is in serious trouble with his wife now, but she doesn't say a word. Weeks go past, wife is silent about all of it. Finally he can't take it anymore, so brings it up. His wife said to him, that she had known for years, found out somehow. But she wouldn't bring it up, because felt that if she stayed silent on the subject that the other three brothers would never bring up repayment, and chance his not going hunting again.
That story made me laugh.

 

[memtb]

The majority of my hunting is a big joke! memtb

 

[FrogFire7]

Coworker had an uncle who shot a buck. After the shot the buck dropped. Uncle goes up to it, sets his rifle on the deers antlers and pours himself a cup of coffee from his thermos to soak in his moment of glory.

'Bout that time, the buck jumps up and takes off... Neither buck nor rifle was ever seen again

 

[dmj]

Coworker had an uncle who shot a buck. After the shot the buck dropped. Uncle goes up to it, sets his rifle on the deers antlers and pours himself a cup of coffee from his thermos to soak in his moment of glory.

'Bout that time, the buck jumps up and takes off... Neither buck nor rifle was ever seen again

Kind of hard to top that one. Good one.

 

[Radman]

If you have heard a funny hunting story, or maybe it happened to you, please share it here.

This morning I was talking with a nice woman, who shared a story with me about her husband, and his brothers.
Not sure how many years ago this took place, but seems the four brothers loved hunting moose together every autumn. Yet the wife of one always complained bitterly about the cost of gas, tags, ammo, his ATV, and such, so he always had to be trying to convince her of saving money on groceries, so he could keep going.

This particular year they shot a moose way back from where they had parked their ATVS, so walked out to where they were parked, and tried riding them in. Somehow they managed to get all four stuck, apparently really stuck.
So they contacted a helicopter company to send a helicopter their way. After flying all four ATVS to dry ground, they figured that since it was already on location, to have the moose also flown out. Concerned that the brother with a cheap wife may never be allowed to hunt again, the other three paid for the helicopter. Slowly over time the fourth brother would slip them a little cash here and there, in hopes of someday paying off his indebtedness.
They were always very careful to not let the story slip out at family functions, lest the cheap wife find out.
It seems some years went by, and the daughter of the cheap wife began dating a young man, whose father was a helicopter pilot. As this young love blossomed, the parents of both decided to have a get together. The pilot remembered the fourth brother, because he had found their predicament one of the funniest of his career. Well he brings the story up, and proceeded to tell it. Brother four figures that he is in serious trouble with his wife now, but she doesn't say a word. Weeks go past, wife is silent about all of it. Finally he can't take it anymore, so brings it up. His wife said to him, that she had known for years, found out somehow. But she wouldn't bring it up, because felt that if she stayed silent on the subject that the other three brothers would never bring up repayment, and chance his not going hunting again.
That story made me laugh.

I love well-trained, smart hunting dogs, don't get me wrong, but this one caught my attention years ago. (Reminds me of what I've always said, "To train a dog you have to be smarter than the dog!")
Two long-time buddies loved bird hunting. One had a new dog but he couldn't make it stop running in like it was crazed, flushing every bird around in all directions. After a long, gruelling, unseasonably warm day of non-productive hunting they crossed their last open expanse & true to form the dog took off like it had been turned loose in a dog food factory! Mad & embarrassed the owner said that he had something to 'fix that dog!' He opened the door of his new 4WD & pulled out a stick of dynamite! Before his shocked buddy could protest the man lit the fuse, shouted, "Fetch!", & threw the dynamite as hard as he could. The loyal dog, still wanting to play, took off after the dynamite. Both men watched the dog not only find but RETRIEVE the dynamite! They watched in horror as the dog, tail wagging, ran full-tilt, back toward them & their ride! As the 2 men ran at top speed in opposite directions away from the truck. The last time the owner saw his dog it was crawling under his nearly new 4WD to enjoy the spoils!
True or not...

 

[Lee7588]

I was bow hunting in Illinois with a buddy of mine in a hang on tree stand not far off of a property line but far enough. And after watching this buck couple of hundred yards away All of a sudden he came running at full speed towards me. I drew my bow back and as he got closer I realized he had already been shot. He dropped dead about 10 ft off the base of a tree that I was in. A little while later this older man came walking up with a crossbow slong over his shoulder and started examining his deer without a clue that I was in the tree above him. The man proceeded to manipulate the deer so he could take a couple of pictures. And after he took a few I quietly whispered excuse me sir and all of a sudden his head was spinning around looking for where the voice came without finding it. I said it again and again the man looked around almost frantically for where the voice came from. At this time I should have said " sir this is God why did you shoot my deer?" But I didn't and said excuse me sir if you look up you'll find the voice. The shock on his face when he did look up and saw me standing there was priceless I did climb down to help him get a picture with him and his deer and offered the help him get it out but he had help on its way. And I decided to call my morning finished. Here's the picture of his deer from my tree stand in a zoomed in picture of the antlers. When I watch this man looking around frantically where the voice came from I almost wet my britches from giggling.

 

[memtb]

On the subject of hunting dogs…. I wish that I could find the audio version of this told by a good ole Louisiana Cajun. Use your best imagination for better effect!

A man and his new hunting dog

A man is sitting at the bar of his local gun club with a few of his buddies after finishing their trap shoot. As they enjoy a cold beer, a man and his dog enter the bar. After a few minutes of pleasantries, the man with the dog says "Yea, this dog is incredible. I don't have to sit around and wait for the ducks to fly in anymore. Now, I just send the dog to the pond, when he returns he'll bark. However many times he barks, that's how many ducks are on the pond."



None of the man's friends believed him, so he wagered $500 and they made their way outside. The man sent his dog down to the first pond, and after a few minutes, the dog came back and barked 3 times. "There are 3 ducks on that pond." The men walked down to the pond, and sure as ****, there were 3 ducks on the pond. Feeling he was being taken for a fool, one man calls ********. "You must have already been down there, double or nothing, but we'll drive down the road and try again."

So the men jumped in their trucks, drove down the road, and again sent the dog down to the pond. When the dog came back, he barked 7 times. "There's 7 ducks on that pond." Again, they walked down to the pond, and again, the dog was right. "That's incredible. I've got to have that dog. I'll give you $5000 for that dog." The man thought for a moment, but wasn't willing to part with the dog. "Fine, I'll give you $10,000 if I can take the dog home right now." $10,000 was a lot of money, so the man decided he could always train another.



With a smile on his face, the new dog owner drove to neighboring towns gun club and walked in. "Guys, I've got the the most incredible dog. I bet you $1,000 each that my dog can run to the lake, come back and bark for each duck on the pond." 5 men took the bet, so the man sent his new dog down. After a couple minutes, the dog came back. Bewilderingly, the dog didn't just bark, but began shaking a stick and humping the guys leg.

"OK guys, sorry he's knew, double or nothing he can do it on the next one." So again he sends the dog down to the pond, and again the dog didn't just bark, but began shaking a stick and humping the guys leg. Furious, the man pays off his debt and shoots the dog. He jumps in his truck and speeds back to the first gun club irate.

"You scum bag, I want my money back. That dog was defective."

"Why do you say that? You clearly saw what he could do as I sent him down in front of your very eyes."

"Well I sent him down to the lake, just like you showed me. When he came back, the dog didn't just bark, but began shaking a stick and humping my leg. TWICE that happened, so I shot the dog and came straight here."

"You f&&&&$# idiot, he was trying to tell you there are more ducks on the pond than you can shake a f&&&&# stick at."

memtb

 

[Sealesniper]

My grandfathers favorite story was from 40 years ago around Laurinburg NC and was in the paper.

Young "know it all" hunter goes out deer hunting for the first time after bragging to his buddies about how he is an expert deer hunter. This was when you had to take your deer by an official station to have it checked in for Wildlife. He had gotten permission to hunt a farm that bordered a local goat farm, and the goats could get out of their fence but always returned. He shot a "buck" and strapped it to his hood and proudly drove to the check in. At the check in, he was informed he shot the farmers Billy goat, was fined and lost hunting rights on that piece of ground indefinitely. Last I heard he had given up hunting.

 

[jessej]

Thibodaux was visiting with his friend Boudreaux one day. Boudreaux asked Thibodaux what he had been up to lately. Thibodaux says, "Well, I just came back from Lafayette."
"What were you doing in Lafayette?" asked Boudreaux.
"I went up dair to buy me a new hunting dog," replies Thibodaux.

Boudreaux says, "Mais, Thibodaux, what's wrong with the hunting dogs from around here?"
Thibodaux says, "Well, this hunting dog can walk on water."

Boudreaux laughs, "Thibodaux, you got fooled. Hunting dogs can't walk on water."
Thibodaux says, "I'm telling you. My new hunting dog can walk on water. You want to see?"
So Boudreaux and Thibodaux go out on the lake with Thibodaux's new hunting dog. Pretty soon, Thibodaux brings down a duck. The dog immediately walks out across the water, retrieves the duck, and jumps back in the boat.
Thibodaux turns to Boudreaux, "So what do you think of dat?"
Boudreaux replies, "That dog can't swim, can he?"

 

[jessej]

Some may hafta listen 4 or 3 times to fully understand

 

[Chadp82]

My dad used to tell this one, and I have no reason to disbelieve it. We hunted the same area for a lot of years, but this happened when my grandpa was alive and before I was old enough to go.

This national forest area had a livestock lease. We would regularly see cattle, sheep, and occasionally mules.

One year my dad and grandpa got stopped by two guys from out of state on the forest service road. The out of towners asked if they had any luck. My dad and grandpa said no and planned to keep moving but these guys said hey we got a couple this morning want to see? Dad and grandpa got out (they really didn't care but were being polite). The guys pulled a tarp back and there were 2 dead mules, field dressed, in the bed of the truck.

My dad said he told them those aren't deer and if they drive about another mile there is a game check station at the county road. He or grandpa didn't say another word to them, and drove off. He never knew what happened to them.

 

[Brad Quarnberg]

I grew up in a fairly small farming town that my grandpa had lived in most of his life.
At the time, during the deer hunt in our state you could shoot either sex (important for later in the story).
One evening grandpa asks my Dad if I can go hunting with him the next day (school day) and after some conversation I was allowed to skip school.
We hunted hard, and while we saw a few deer, there wasn't anything grandpa wanted to shoot.
On the way out of the canyon we rounded a bend in the road and noticed a game check station and a truck just pulling away in front of us.
Grandpa pulls up and the game warden was a guy he'd gone to school with, so he asks what's so funny. The guys finally stops laughing and tells him this young out of state hunter had pulled up in his truck (the one leaving as we rounded the bend) and he's all excited, tells the warden he's shot the biggest deer in his life and can't wait to show him.
They walk around the back and the guy opens the door on the cap and drops the tail gate. The warden is really trying not to bust a gut at this point and says he looked at the license and tag, told the guy congratulations and sent him on his way.
The warden can't hold it in any longer and starts laughing so hard he's crying. Grandpa looks at me and then turns back to the warden and says something like "my hell Bill (I don't remember his name) what is so **** funny: you been drinking or something?
After a couple of minutes, the warden gets his laughing under control and says someone is going to be pretty mad when they find their mule missing in the morning.
At that point we all started laughing, then Grandpa says did you tell him he'd shot a mule, and the warden say "I didn't have the heart to tell him".
We laughed all the way home and Grandpa must have told that story for the next month to anyone he knew and if I remember correctly, it just got better with each telling.

 

[59FLH]

Mule Deer stories.

 

[Critter Picker]

Back in the 70's I was fox hunting. Back then a fox would fetch $100.00 if you didn't have any pelt damage. I used a 6MM with 90 grain FMJ's to minimize pelt damage. So one fine day I ended up with a Samson fox. They have fur that looks and feels more like wool than fur,but from a distance you can't tell them from a good pelt.

So I take this fox and curl him up so it looks like he's sleeping and let him freeze in that position. There was a road that a lot of road hunters used to frequent and about half a mile off that road was a fence line. Perfect place for a fox to lay and sun itself. It took me about a 2 mile hike to get on the back side of that fence line so I wouldn't leave any visible tracks.and put the frozen fox in that fence line so you could see it from the road.

Sure enough the next day there was tracks all the way out to tha frozen fox from that road. Sure would have liked to have today's technology to put a trail cam to see who the lucky hunter was that shot that frozen fox.