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<blockquote data-quote="James Jones" data-source="post: 190860" data-attributes="member: 8843"><p><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENTAL CANDIDATE, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH? </u></strong></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>Since congress does not want to spend any m ore money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United K ingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the countries listed there. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #4181ff"><span style="color: #4181ff"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>THEN EVERY YEAR THERE AFTER IT'll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.</u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u> </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hellholes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France, Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to beg in towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York! </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not ****ing us off for a change.</u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong><u>Mexico is also on List 2. I</u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><u><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>ts president</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong> and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra </strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>thousand</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>tank</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>s</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong> and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep, border security. </strong></span></span></span></span></strong></u><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska - which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin." </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial Black'"><strong><u>Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America It is time to eliminate homelessness in America. To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong><u>To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic. </u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong><u></u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="color: #2f2f2f"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong><u>God bless America . Thank you and good night.</u></strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="James Jones, post: 190860, member: 8843"] [COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT='Arial Black'][B][U]WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENTAL CANDIDATE, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH? [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT='Arial Black'][/FONT][/COLOR][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT='Arial Black'][B][U]My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed. Since congress does not want to spend any m ore money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United K ingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the countries listed there. The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening. Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=#4181ff][COLOR=#4181ff][FONT='Arial Black'][B][U]THEN EVERY YEAR THERE AFTER IT'll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.[/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Arial Black'][B][U] The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hellholes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption. Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France. In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France, Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][U][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Arial Black'][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/U][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to beg in towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York! [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not ****ing us off for a change.[/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][B] [U]Mexico is also on List 2. I[/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][U][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT=Verdana][B]ts president[/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][B] and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra [/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT=Verdana][B]thousand[/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=navy][COLOR=navy][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][B]tank[/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT=Verdana][B]s[/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][B] and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep, border security. [/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/U][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska - which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin." [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial Black][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Arial Black'][B] [U]Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America It is time to eliminate homelessness in America. To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget. [/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#2f2f2f][COLOR=#2f2f2f][FONT=Arial][B] [U]To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic. God bless America . Thank you and good night.[/U][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][B][FONT=Arial][COLOR=navy][COLOR=navy][FONT=Arial][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [/QUOTE]
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