When life gets tough, there is hope

Mram10us said:
I'm not saying this to get attention, but to show you guys, there is hope when things get rough.... cause, they will. We have a great community here and support is always helpful.

May11th @ 0615 I was driving out to the range to meet a friend to shoot. I had just left the house 10 minutes prior, told the wife I loved her and handed her a protein shake on the couch(she was big into crossfit). Got down the road and she calls saying something is really wrong in her head ... we prayed on the phone... she said "I'm dying" and she dropped the phone. I got home about a minute later to find her convulsing. Called 911 and sat in the hospital with her for 5 days till I had to disconnect her from lifesupport on May 15th. She had a pontine stroke which isn't good and she never woke up.

A lot went on in those 5 days, but it would make the post a few pages. She was a christian and loved God. I was a "christian" but not where I should have been. Thru those 12 weeks till now, I have been broken and had all sorts of thoughts because I loved her more than anything. God took me from a very dark place to wanting to bless others and help them thru this kind of junk. Point is, when you hit your breaking point, which I definitely did, God loves you. I'm here if anyone is having suicidal thoughts or whatever.View attachment 206116
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I am deeply sorry for your loss. I also feel the pain of a lost loved one. On Jan 27 COVID took my mom. She was my rock, best friend as well as my hunting buddy. She always looked forward to viewing the new trail pictures and was always beside the phone waiting for me to tell her that I had gotten a deer. We as a group are here for you buddy.
 
Mram10us said:
I'm not saying this to get attention, but to show you guys, there is hope when things get rough.... cause, they will. We have a great community here and support is always helpful.

May11th @ 0615 I was driving out to the range to meet a friend to shoot. I had just left the house 10 minutes prior, told the wife I loved her and handed her a protein shake on the couch(she was big into crossfit). Got down the road and she calls saying something is really wrong in her head ... we prayed on the phone... she said "I'm dying" and she dropped the phone. I got home about a minute later to find her convulsing. Called 911 and sat in the hospital with her for 5 days till I had to disconnect her from lifesupport on May 15th. She had a pontine stroke which isn't good and she never woke up.

A lot went on in those 5 days, but it would make the post a few pages. She was a christian and loved God. I was a "christian" but not where I should have been. Thru those 12 weeks till now, I have been broken and had all sorts of thoughts because I loved her more than anything. God took me from a very dark place to wanting to bless others and help them thru this kind of junk. Point is, when you hit your breaking point, which I definitely did, God loves you. I'm here if anyone is having suicidal thoughts or whatever.View attachment 206116
Click to expand...
Very sorry for your loss. This is the story I'll read Everytime I think my life isn't going so well. Puts things back in perspective. Not alot can be worse than what you've endured. Stay strong and keep your faith just as strong. John.
 
There's no words anyone can ever say to take the hurt from this away . All we can do is try our best to help. In the last year I've personally buried a beautiful 16 yr old young lady who was a friend to my sons . And my wife's cousins newborn son . Life sure doesn't seem fair sometimes ! Remember to live life to the fullest because the next moment is not promised . I am so sorry to hear of your loss . Prayers for you
 
Mram10us, today is exactly 10 years from the date my wife called me when I was on a walk prepping for a hunt. She told me to get home ASAP, something was wrong. I was almost 2 miles from house but I ran as much as I could to get there as fast as I could. When I got to her, she was white as a sheet. I didn't even call 911, I knew she didn't have the time. I got to a local hospital in 10 min and rushed her into Emergency Room. They triaged immediately. Could not find anything wrong at first then they did. I was told she had minimal chance of survival due to hiatal hernia which is a tear in her diaphram causing her stomach to enter her thoracic cavity, twist, die and burst. Sat with priest, my son, his wife and close friends thru the 4+ surgery. Somehow she made it. She was given less than 25% chance of surviving the next 10 days. Somehow she did.

She is doing OK but severely at risk for everything so we are in major lockdown. I was not a Church person but I was on my knees for weeks and now I understand.

I feel your pain that is to the core of your own being. I am crying my eyes out trying to write my feeling down to you that reflect my understanding of the pain you are feeling but I hope you reach out to those who can you can lean on and talk to when you need to.

God bless,
Muddy
 
Thru this I've learned what blessings came from it. It could have been far worse.
1. I could have been on the road and not able to fix her that shake, tell her I loved her or pray for her on the phone
2. I was able to sit at her bedside 22hrs a day for 5 days, pray for her, hold her hand, kiss her face and tell her how much I loved her.
3. It was quick and final. The doctors told me there was nothing I could have done, because you know we always ask what we could have done to fix things
4. It changed me in a huge way. I don't hate God for it, I'm thankful she didn't feel pain like some have. Glad she didn't have to see me like that. I always told her that my mom and her have to go first, then I'm good.
Anyway, again, the point of this thread is to let you know God loves you no matter what this sinful world throws at you and there is always hope.
 
Mram10us said:
Thru this I've learned what blessings came from it. It could have been far worse.
1. I could have been on the road and not able to fix her that shake, tell her I loved her or pray for her on the phone
2. I was able to sit at her bedside 22hrs a day for 5 days, pray for her, hold her hand, kiss her face and tell her how much I loved her.
3. It was quick and final. The doctors told me there was nothing I could have done, because you know we always ask what we could have done to fix things
4. It changed me in a huge way. I don't hate God for it, I'm thankful she didn't feel pain like some have. Glad she didn't have to see me like that. I always told her that my mom and her have to go first, then I'm good.
Anyway, again, the point of this thread is to let you know God loves you no matter what this sinful world throws at you and there is always hope.
Click to expand...
There is hope...as you have so sorrowfully and beautifully attested to.

Isaiah 25:6-9
Revelation 21:1-7
 
Mram10us said:
I'm not saying this to get attention, but to show you guys, there is hope when things get rough.... cause, they will. We have a great community here and support is always helpful.

May11th @ 0615 I was driving out to the range to meet a friend to shoot. I had just left the house 10 minutes prior, told the wife I loved her and handed her a protein shake on the couch(she was big into crossfit). Got down the road and she calls saying something is really wrong in her head ... we prayed on the phone... she said "I'm dying" and she dropped the phone. I got home about a minute later to find her convulsing. Called 911 and sat in the hospital with her for 5 days till I had to disconnect her from lifesupport on May 15th. She had a pontine stroke which isn't good and she never woke up.

A lot went on in those 5 days, but it would make the post a few pages. She was a christian and loved God. I was a "christian" but not where I should have been. Thru those 12 weeks till now, I have been broken and had all sorts of thoughts because I loved her more than anything. God took me from a very dark place to wanting to bless others and help them thru this kind of junk. Point is, when you hit your breaking point, which I definitely did, God loves you. I'm here if anyone is having suicidal thoughts or whatever.View attachment 206116
Click to expand...
God Bless you Brother. I haven't suffered such a loss as yours. My heart goes out to you. I'm a Christian beleiver in Jesus also. I went for about 6 years being angry with a chip on my shoulder at God cause so many things didn't work out. Prayers that he answered but I didn't think he fulfilled them. He showed me one day after those 6years that the things that I thought "didn't work out" actually all worked out even better that I could have planned it all myself. I had more than I deserved for that entire time but I was so Lacking in faith that I couldn't see all that I had been blessed with and all of the good things he would do for me. And there was still some things that happened and times when I was treated unfairly and my children treated unfairly but all that put me on an alternate course to a better place in life that I wouldn't have went otherwise.

I can't tell you how many people I've come across that has told me this has been the worst year of their life. Not just associated with the virus but all sorts of other mayhem in their lives. Its trying times. I'm gonna post a screenshot of something I had to read every night before I went to bed a while back just so I could have some peace before going to sleep.

Screenshot_20200730-144609.png
 
I understand what you are going through I did it myself awhile back get back in the woods or on the water and you will find her again in those places I know I did it was **** tuff the first couple times but now I look forward to it do not let it get you to far down easier said than done but it appears you are on the right track and be greatful you had her while you did
 
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