Need guidance from Law Enforcement

[Orange Dust]

Guys, I need your help. My daughter divorced a Deputy that had 10 years on the force. The reason is he couldn't leave the job there when he came home. He was involved with the worst of the worst and it took a toll on him. He just couldn't turn off being mean when he got home. Beat her up a couple of times for no reason. Some folks should never be married. Now, with that background, its happening all over again. She is dating (smitten really) with another Deputy. This guy is a rookie still in training and has neither had to deal with really bad folks, nor had to deal with being mean all day and turning it off when he gets home. I need to start out on the right foot. She is bringing him to meet us Sunday. Here is where I really need some help and guidance from you guys. What can I do to help see that this doesn't happen all over again? I had a great relationship with the first one. We really enjoyed hunting and shooting together, but I was useless helping my daughter defusing the pent up anger he brought home. I do get it, I know just how difficult your jobs are, got the blow by blow every day. But, I really want to learn what I can do to keep this from happening again.

 

[Coyote Shadow Tracker]

It's the person not the job! LE doesn't be mean all day and then have to turn it off when they come home. It should never have been turned on. If your in LE and have to be mean all day you DON"T belong in LE. Also personalities don't change unless your schizophrenic.

 

[Orange Dust]

It's the person not the job! LE doesn't be mean all day and then have to turn it off when they come home. It should never have been turned on. If your in LE and have to be mean all day you DON"T belong in LE. Also personalities don't change unless your schizophrenic.

You're giving me hope, Brother.

 

[Coyote Shadow Tracker]

An officer doesnt have a day on duty and beats up a couple of gang bangers then comes home and thinks "I had fun beating up those guys today so I'll beat my wife when I get home to top the day off. Sad to say but your daughtes X was a "Sick puppy" and an AS**le for hitting his wife. He should be kicked off the force because he probably does a lot of illegal stuff during the day. The police force didn't make your daughter's X a mean person. He was that way long before being in LE.

 

[Orange Dust]

An officer doesnt have a day on duty and beats up a couple of gang bangers then comes home and thinks "I had fun beating up those guy today so I'll beat my wife when I get home to top the day off. Sad to say but your daughtes X was a "Sick puppy" and an AS**le for hitting his wife. He should be kicked off the force because he probably does a lot of illegal stuff during the day.

You are really good at this. Most illegal stuff he did to my knowledge was fabricating evidence and lying in court, actually mostly omitting the truth when it hurt his case. He would tell you at least once per hour how he never lies. He played the victim better than anyone I have ever met.

 

[Coyote Shadow Tracker]

Will say some prayers for both you and your daughter. I am sure that she has experience and better judgement with her selection of the new person she is dating. Don't confuse what type person he may be just because he is in LE. If you need to talk more let's take this off line. PM me.

Thanks
Len

 

[Orange Dust]

Will say some prayers for both you and your daughter. I am sure that she has experience and better judgement with her selection of the new person she is dating. Don't confuse what type person he may be just because he is in LE. If you need to talk more let's take this off line. PM me.

Thanks
Len

THANKS A BUNCH! I will wait until after I have actually met the guy on Sunday. I don't want to mess this up for her, but I will protect her...... Fine line

 

[Rick Richard]

Prayers for you and your daughter brother.

You can't predict the outcome of a relationship since that is between her and her fellow. However, I would have that heart to heart conversation with him and your daughter and express your feelings. Honesty up front will let him know how you stand and what you are willing to do if things go south.

 

[adam32+P]

It's the person not the job! LE doesn't be mean all day and then have to turn it off when they come home. It should never have been turned on. If your in LE and have to be mean all day you DON"T belong in LE. Also personalities don't change unless your schizophrenic.

Being a cop in a farm town of 1,000 people is much different than in Compton or South side LA...if you're "nice" you'll get killed.

Doesn't make an excuse for wife beating but, not all jobs are created equal.

 

[Orange Dust]

Being a cop in a farm town of 1,000 people is much different than in Compton or South side LA...if you're "nice" you'll get killed.

Doesn't make an excuse for wife beating but, not all jobs are created equal.

True, her X was on a small team of hunters, whose only job was to hunt down and catch or kill really bad people. He was cold and mean. I never had a problem with him. He was afraid of me.

 

[Orange Dust]

Prayers for you and your daughter brother.

You can't predict the outcome of a relationship since that is between her and her fellow. However, I would have that heart to heart conversation with him and your daughter and express your feelings. Honesty up front will let him know how you stand and what you are willing to do if things go south.

Had that discussion with the first one. Might be why he was afraid of me after he got to know me better.... kept it legal though! Hard, but I did.

 

[74honker]

It's tough being a dad of a daughter. My one and only is engauged to an LE. He really is a fantastic guy and one I'm good with to call family. They've been together about 3yrs now and he knows right where we stand. I'd have a harder time holding my wife back God forbid something like what you went through happened to our girl! Prayers are with you.

 

[Orange Dust]

It's tough being a dad of a daughter. My one and only is engauged to an LE. He really is a fantastic guy and one I'm good with to call family. They've been together about 3yrs now and he knows right where we stand. I'd have a harder time holding my wife back God forbid something like what you went through happened to our girl! Prayers are with you.

Thank you, You know how I feel. God didn't save the first one from me. My wife did. She didn't tell me the truth until it came out in court. She just said give me your checkbook and keep your mouth shut. She knew what I would do.... There is no bigger blessing than having a good wife!

 

[74honker]

Thank you, You know how I feel. God didn't save the first one from me. My wife did. She didn't tell me the truth until it came out in court. She just said give me your checkbook and keep your mouth shut. She knew what I would do.... There is no bigger blessing than having a good wife!

AMEN to that!