What Confucius did not say ...

Discussion in 'Humor' started by FEENIX, Jul 16, 2013.

  1. FEENIX

    FEENIX Well-Known Member

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    [FONT=&quot]CONFUCIUS DID NOT SAY...

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.[/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]
    Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent.

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts.

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.
    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]
    Man who runs in front of car gets tired, man who runs behind car gets [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]exhausted[/FONT][FONT=&quot].[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]War does not determine who is right, it determines who is left.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]It takes many nails to build a crib but only one screw to fill it.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

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    [FONT=&quot]Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Finally CONFUCIUS DID SAY. . ...[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]"A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!"[/FONT]
     
  2. Outlaw6.0

    Outlaw6.0 Well-Known Member

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    The last one was the very best!!

    That's great stuff...


    t
     

  3. SidecarFlip

    SidecarFlip Well-Known Member

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    He might have said (depending on if he was a dirty old man)....

    'Woman who spring on bedspring get offspring, next spring'.....

    and

    Woman who fly upside down, crack up'......:D

    Thats what happens when your 64th birthday was yesterday......:)
     
  4. Outlaw6.0

    Outlaw6.0 Well-Known Member

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    lol, there's two I've never heard.


    "Man who go to bed with itchy butt, wake up with stinky finger"

    and

    "Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day..." (hope that doesn't offend anyone)


    t
     
  5. SidecarFlip

    SidecarFlip Well-Known Member

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    Offend, not me. This is supposed to be an adult forum even though I've seen and read posts that would belie that fact.
     
  6. Outlaw6.0

    Outlaw6.0 Well-Known Member

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    LOL! Amen brother.


    t
     
  7. twintips16

    twintips16 Well-Known Member

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    What he did say:

    Good to meet girl in park...... Better to park meat in girl!!!!:D
     
  8. bamahuntnfool

    bamahuntnfool Member

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    x2! :D
     
  9. EddieHarren

    EddieHarren Well-Known Member

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    Confucius say, "Who say I say all those things people say I say?"
     
  10. ML ll THUMBHOLE

    ML ll THUMBHOLE Member

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    woman virginity like big party balloon...... one prick.. all gone!
     
  11. Doublezranch

    Doublezranch Well-Known Member

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    Man go through turnstyle going to bangkok!!


    LOVE IT!!!! :D:D