The Lone Ranger and Tonto

[Sendero_Man]

The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent
all set up, both men fell sound
asleep.
Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says,
"Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see? "

"The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What that tell you?" asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says,
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of
galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically , it tells me that Saturn is in Leo
Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning.
Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell
you, Tonto?"





"You dumber than buffalo ****. It means someone stole the tent.

 

[Grunter]

Here is another Tonto and the Lone Ranger one.

Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding, out on the prairie, lost. Frustrated, the Lone Ranger tells Tonto to get off his horse and see if he can work out where they are.

Tonto gets off his horse and puts his ear to the ground, listening for any other riders etc.

About 5 minutes later, the Lone Ranger, still ****ed off, asks Tonto if he has found anything yet.

Tonto replies "Buffalo come"

Lone ranger stands up in his saddle looking for the buffalo, he can't see anything, not any dust on the horizon stirred up by a bunch of buffalo.

He asks Tonto, how can you possibly know that, I can't see any sign of buffalo.

Tonto replies "Ear stuck to ground"!