The 5 kinds of Marital Sex...

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Southpaw, May 1, 2008.

  1. Southpaw

    Southpaw Well-Known Member

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    1) The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honeymoon period; you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face.

    2) The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage; you'll have sex anywhere, anytime, even in the kitchen.

    3) The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom.

    4) The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is the phase in which you pass each other in the hallway and say, "Screw you!"

    5) There is also a fifth kind of sex: Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of everyone in the courtroom.
     
  2. jwp475

    jwp475 Well-Known Member

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    I have experience in all of the phases of maritial sex, some phases are more fun than others.... I realy like the Smurf phase myself...
     

  3. Varmint Hunter

    Varmint Hunter Well-Known Member

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    While I prefer the Kitchen Sex, I'm more likely to get the Hallway Sex. Time for a new girlfriend!
     
  4. gamehauler

    gamehauler Well-Known Member

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    Stage 4 here:mad:
    Lets hope no stage 5.
    You guys would be getting some deals:eek:
    Mike