Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
Articles
Latest reviews
Author list
Classifieds
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles and first posts only
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Chatting and General Stuff
Humor
Ever had a bad day?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Mike44" data-source="post: 1131336" data-attributes="member: 92450"><p>Here is another Bad Day story I read:</p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><p>Bob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. </p><p>He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. </p><p> </p><p>Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio </p><p>station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst </p><p>job experience contest. Needless to say, she won. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Hi Sue, </p><p>Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a </p><p>bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so </p><p>I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not </p><p>so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first </p><p>must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies </p><p>at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This </p><p>time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: </p><p>We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of </p><p>equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful </p><p>temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped </p><p>to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it </p><p>several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and </p><p>start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. </p><p>This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. </p><p>Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to </p><p>itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a </p><p>few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, </p><p>but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water </p><p>machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, </p><p>since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. </p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">dive. </span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px"> I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">with tears of laughter, running down his face, handed me a tube of cream </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">shut. </span></span></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.' </span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">day? </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!! </span></span></p><p></p><p> </p><p> <a href="http://www.woodsnwater.forumchitchat.com/post?id=3165677&goto=nextoldest" target="_blank">Previous Topic</a> | <a href="http://www.woodsnwater.forumchitchat.com/post?id=3165677&goto=nextnewest" target="_blank">Next Topic</a> </p><p><a href="http://www.woodsnwater.forumchitchat.com/printthread?id=3165677" target="_blank">Print</a></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mike44, post: 1131336, member: 92450"] Here is another Bad Day story I read: [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3] [/SIZE][/FONT] Bob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won. Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3]However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. [/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3] I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter, running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut. [/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3] [/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3]So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.' Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day? May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!! [/SIZE][/FONT] [URL="http://www.woodsnwater.forumchitchat.com/post?id=3165677&goto=nextoldest"]Previous Topic[/URL] | [URL="http://www.woodsnwater.forumchitchat.com/post?id=3165677&goto=nextnewest"]Next Topic[/URL] [URL="http://www.woodsnwater.forumchitchat.com/printthread?id=3165677"]Print[/URL] [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Chatting and General Stuff
Humor
Ever had a bad day?
Top