Dear Abby

Discussion in 'Humor' started by philny1, Jul 25, 2008.

  1. philny1

    philny1 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    698
    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2006
    Dear Abby,

    I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas , who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Fort Worth. One of my sisters lives
    in Pflugerville and is married to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially
    dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas. I have two brothers: one is currently serving a life sentence at Huntsville for the murder
    of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children. I have recently become
    engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time 'working girl'.

    All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiance and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest
    with her. Should I tell her about my cousin who supports Barack Obama for President?

    Signed,
    Worried About My Reputation
     
  2. edge

    edge Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,088
    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2005
    Dear Worried,

    Your cousin should be shunned, and his name and address put on the list with dangerous sexual offenders.

    Do not tell the next Mrs. Worried or she will leave you for the next pimp that comes along. She would never be able to hold her head up in society were anyone to find out!

    Abby.