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7 degrees of blonde

 
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  #1  
Old 05-31-2010, 10:24 PM
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Posts: 252
7 degrees of blonde

FIRST DEGREE

A married couple was asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up.
The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear."

` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,- ?` ?*:-.,_,..- ?

SECOND DEGREE

Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the first blonde hands her the compact.

The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"

` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-..,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,. - ?` ?*:-.,_,- ?` ?*:-.,_,.-

THIRD DEGREE

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry.

She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief.

She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!"

The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"

` ?*:-.,_,.- ? `? *:-.,_,.-? `? *:-.,_,.-? `? *:-.,_,-? `? *:-..,_,.-? `? *

FOURTH DEGREE

A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.

She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them."

A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?"

The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."

`? *:-.,_,.-? ` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,..- ?` ?*:-.,_,- ?` ?*:-.,_,.-

FIFTH DEGREE
What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?

"Is it mine?"

`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-..,_,-?`?*:-..,_,.-?`?*

SIXTH DEGREE

Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US government class.

The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.

Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington

had to make before he crossed the Delaware "

`?*:-.,_, -?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*

SEVENTH DEGREE

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized.

She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.

The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the

first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen.

I call the police for help, and what do they do?

They send me a BLIND policeman."

`? *:-.,_,.-? `? *:-.,_,.-? `? *:-.,_,.-? `? *:-.,_,-? `? *:-.,_,.-? `? *

FIRST DEGREE

A married couple was asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up.
The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear."

` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,- ?` ?*:-.,_,..- ?

SECOND DEGREE

Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the first blonde hands her the compact.

The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"

` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-..,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,. - ?` ?*:-.,_,- ?` ?*:-.,_,.-

THIRD DEGREE

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry.

She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief.

She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!"

The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"

` ?*:-.,_,.- ? `? *:-.,_,.-? `? *:-.,_,.-? `? *:-.,_,-? `? *:-..,_,.-? `? *

FOURTH DEGREE

A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.

She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them."

A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?"

The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."

`? *:-.,_,.-? ` ?*:-.,_,.- ?` ?*:-.,_,..- ?` ?*:-.,_,- ?` ?*:-.,_,.-

FIFTH DEGREE
What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?

"Is it mine?"

`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-..,_,-?`?*:-..,_,.-?`?*

SIXTH DEGREE

Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US government class.

The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.

Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington

had to make before he crossed the Delaware "

`?*:-.,_, -?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*:-.,_,-?`?*:-.,_,.-?`?*

SEVENTH DEGREE

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized.

She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.

The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the

first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen.

I call the police for help, and what do they do?

They send me a BLIND policeman."
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  #2  
Old 05-31-2010, 10:36 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Philadelphia Pa.
Posts: 386
Re: 7 degrees of blonde

What can you say too this
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  #3  
Old 06-01-2010, 10:03 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Redmond Or.
Posts: 2,527
Re: 7 degrees of blonde

This is hilarious! My wifes nickname is blondie for these same reasons. I Love my wife, but ya, sometimes......
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  #4  
Old 08-08-2010, 08:12 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 9
Re: 7 degrees of blonde

Hilarious loved it specially number 2.
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  #5  
Old 08-14-2010, 10:54 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,538
Re: 7 degrees of blonde

Pretty funny.
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  #6  
Old 09-13-2010, 04:09 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 11
Re: 7 degrees of blonde

Funny! There were a couple I hadn't heard before. Number 7 is good.
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  #7  
Old 09-13-2010, 04:52 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: McLean, Virginia
Posts: 985
Re: 7 degrees of blonde

Haha great!! Got a good laugh out of em, thanks.
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